advice is negotiation
nobody gives you neutral advice. every suggestion carries the giver's incentives, risk appetite and reputation. treat it as a position, not a verdict — and take only what fits your situation.
Nobody gives you neutral advice. Not me, not a VC, not the founder who sold a company for 200 million. Every suggestion comes with the person’s incentives, their risk appetite, their reputation attached. That doesn’t make it worthless. It makes it a position in a negotiation you’re running, not a verdict you have to accept.
Start by reading the incentive behind the recommendation. When a crypto fund says you have to take a particular investor, hear what’s underneath: no one in crypto will tell you to reject a legendary trader, because they all want to stay in his good books. When the fund that introduced you says “6MV will tell me you have to take them,” that sentence means you’re an employee of 6MV. Be loyal to one thing — the company — and suddenly everyone’s advice sorts itself into useful and self-serving.
VCs are the clearest case. If a VC says nice things about your startup, that doesn’t mean anything; their job is to be nice to everyone, and they talk to a hundred founders a week. When one says “you’re too early,” ask exactly what number would make it interesting. If they can name it, they’re serious. If they can’t, they’re fishing, they have a quota to fill, and now you know. “We add a lot of value” is the same trick — value add almost never comes from the people who say the words value add.
Then take the reasoning, not the conclusion. When I throw ideas at a founder — launch your own asset, spend 5,000 pumping the chart by hand — I’m handing over the worst ideas on purpose. The point is to make them think that way, not to do those specific things. Copy my conclusion and you’ve learned nothing. Take the reasoning underneath it and you can apply it to a situation I’ve never seen. It’s also why I’ll often send a founder a book or a video instead of a tactic — the problem is usually three levels under the one they asked about, and a tactic only fixes the top level.
Consider the source before you weight it. You don’t want to learn go-to-market from the third best guy. Learn it from the person who’s actually built the exponential curve. A podcast, a generic mentor, me on a bad day — all suggestions, all discountable.
Which brings me to the rule I tell every cohort on day one: the only laws are laws of physics. Everything else is a suggestion. Including the rules I set. Take what fits your situation and leave the rest. A VC’s veto clause that will never be exercised is fine to sign. The same clause from a fund that would actually use it is a dealbreaker. Same words, different call — and only you can make it, because only you can see your whole iceberg.
the call where i said it best
A team with great backgrounds asked why no VC had ever told them to raise a small round first and scale later. I said that’s our job — the VC across the table has no reason to tell you the move that costs them leverage. Then I gave them the script anyway. Good advice and self-interested advice can come out of the same mouth in the same meeting. Your whole job is to tell them apart.
do this this week
Take the last strong piece of advice someone gave you. Next to it, write down what they’d gain if you followed it. Then decide again.
the line to remember
the only laws are laws of physics. everything else is a suggestion. including the rules i set.